The other day I had a long interesting conversation with a woman. It was the second time that we met, but since we were waiting for someone else, and we both like talking, we had a nice chat. We talked pretty much about everything, but we emphasized ‘men’ topic. I couldn’t believe how close and identified I felt with her words, that could perfectly be mine talking to one of my friend in another moment. Apparently, we both have experienced similar things and had equal perspective about men.

What’s going on between men and women? What is wrong with them or/and with us? Romantic love is finished, we can make our love as romantics and cheesy as we want, but it will probably got into an end. Isn’t it time to build a new way of loving? Couldn’t we imagine a new way of relating to each other? I dated different guys and for most of them I had the same conclusions: if they have a problem basically wait ’til it’s solved by itself, if they had a problem they barely talked about it and talking about compromise was a scary topic. This wasn’t all the time like that, of course men have moments when they fight for their own problems, but we are definitively different.

Being aware of these differences is really important, but shouldn’t the BOTH of them be aware of it? ‘Cause I remember myself reading books, asking friends or going to the shrink … and men usually didn’t have the same worry. And I’m not saying the should be worry about me or my necessities all the fucking time, hell no! I love my freedom and the way I can come and go anywhere I want tob, but couples have to find their balance…

Beyond respect and communication, I think that the most important “qualities” I’d like my life-partner to have are: responsibility, evolution and compromise. Responsibility towards me and towards himself, responsibility means that you take care of yourself, that you try to love you and accept you. It also means that if you say something you become the owner of your words and you should try to act accordingly to your thoughts and speech. Evolution to grow, to accept difference, change and to be flexible to the couple, life and towards yourself. Just don’t limit and shape yourself, just ask things to your couple and let your partner push you towards (and vice versa) certains levels that you haven’t explored before. Compromise, this is the “I knew it!” or “O-H, G-O-D!” reaction to the ‘compromise’ word. Why are men so scared to compromise? Compromise can be so different from one person to another and it is important to know where your partner’s one is. I believe it should be arranged and it is good to know where the couple is going, what everyone would like to achieve, to live together… would you like to have kids? to buy a house? to have a dog/lovebird/cats?

That is the way I think, so far. Those are my thoughts and I respect if you have a different one or if I meet someone who doesn’t agree with me. Oh well, if after a while we don’t find our middle way and our balance, it’s just because it wasn’t meant to be.

I want to be with someone who wants to live his life and will ‘fight’ for it (like my friend B said).